


Ghostbusters Vs Evil Dead

by Baz



Category: Ash vs Evil Dead (TV), Evil Dead (Movies), Evil Dead - All Media Types, Ghostbusters (1984-1989; 2020), Ghostbusters - All Media Types, The Real Ghostbusters
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:21:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28649715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baz/pseuds/Baz
Summary: Walter Peck wants to get rid of the Ghostbusters once and for all. One day, he finds the Necronomicon and reads from it, hopping the evil would get rid of the Ghostbusters.The people of New York become deadites, and it is up to the Ghostbusters to stop the evil.They also get help from Ash, much to their dismay.Will the Ghostbusters be able to stop the evil, and also be able to put up with Ash?
Relationships: Janine Melnitz/Louis Tully
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

GHOSTBUSTERS VS EVIL DEAD

It is 1994.

Walter Peck watched the TV in disgust as there was a news report about the Ghostbusters saving the day yet again.

How Peck loathed them. He always wanted to prove that they were frauds.

But really Peck was an asshole who didn’t like it when he wasn’t the centre of attention.

He just wished that a portal of some sort would just make the Ghostbusters disappear or something.

But how?

One day when walking down the street, Peck walked past a salesman who was selling mystical items on a table.

“See anything you like, my man?” asked the salesman.

“It’s all junk,” replied Peck. “And it was probably all stolen.”

“Naw, it wasn’t stolen, honest,” said the salesman.

Peck could tell that he was lying.

But there was something that caught Peck’s attention.

A strange evil looking book. 

“What is that?” asked Peck.

“Some weird evil book that makes everybody turn evil or something,” said the salesman.

“It looks disgusting,” said Peck as he picked the book up and examined it.

“It’s made from human flesh and written in blood,” said the salesman.

“Bullshit,” replied Peck.

“That’s what the notes inside say,” said the salesman.

Peck opened the book and saw that there were notes inside. Written by a Professor Raymond Knowby.

Peck was getting intrigued.

“How much is this disgusting book?” asked Peck.

“$50,” answered the salesman.

“Tell you what,” said Peck. “I’ll give you $40, and I will not let the authorities know that you are a thief.”

The salesman looked nervous.

“Er…..deal.”

Peck paid for the book and took it home. 

He sat at his desk reading the notes from Professor Knowby. And of course, the notes had the translations on it.

Peck grinned evilly.

  
  
  
  
  
  


Peter Venkman was at the art gallery. He was going to have a chat with Dana.

But when he got there, another man was talking to her.

He was a cocky looking guy with black hair and a big chin.

“That son of a bitch,” Peter muttered angrily, as this big chinned moron was hitting on HIS girl.

“Mr Willaims, I told you that I am not interested,” Dana told the man.

“C’mon, baby,” said the man.

Yes it was Ash, no shit.

“Baby?” asked Dana.

“One you’ve been with the King, you’ll never go back,” said Ash.

“The King? What are you, Elvis?” asked Dana.

“No, but people say that I look like him,” said Ash. 

_If Elvis had a big chin_ , thought Peter.

“I got a nice car outside,” Ash flirted with Dana. “It's a Delta. It's a classic. I think you’ll like the back seat.”

Dana looked at him disgusted.

“No, now please go away,” she said.

“Is this because I am handicapped?” asked Ash.

“Handicapped?” asked Dana.

“Yeah, I only got one hand,” said Ash as he showed Dana his wooden hand. 

_I can think of how he lost that hand,_ Peter thought with a cheeky smile.

“Got something against the disabled?” Ash asked Dana. “That’s racism.”

Dana had enough.

“Look, Ashley, if you don’t go away, you will lose your other hand,” she said sternly.

“Whoa, okay I’m going,” replied a defeated Ash. “But just to let you know, I’ve had better.”

Ash walked out of the gallery in a huff. Peter walked over to Dana.

“What was that thing?”

“Some jerk from Michigan,” said Dana.

“Oh, that’s much worse,” remarked Peter.

  
  
  
  
  
  


Later Peter went to Ghostbusters H.Q. Janine looked happy.

“Janine there’s something wrong with your face,” snarked Peter. “But then, what’s new.”

“Janine has some good news,” said Egon.

“She’s retiring,” replied Peter with a smile.

“I’m engaged to Louis,” said Janine, who had enough of Peter’s smart ass-ness.

“Two four eyes, a match made in Heaven,” remarked Peter. “Egon, you just lost your chance.”

“Would it kill you to be nice once in a while?” asked an annoyed Janine.

“Peter being nice?” said Winston. “That’ll be the day.”

  
  
  
  
  


That night, Peck was ready to perform the incantation.

He read from the notes:

“Kanda, Mistropean, Manda, Soran……”

An evil force began to run through New York. 

There was a couple walking on the street. Both in their 20’s. They were just flirting away, until they saw the evil force in front of them.

“What the hell is that?” asked the girl.

The evil force ran up to the man and sent him flying across the street.

“Paul?” asked the girl as she ran up to him.

The man got up and the girl screamed as she looked at his face.

His face looked evil and his eyes were white. 

“JOIN US!” he growled in a demonic voice.

The girl ran away in terror, but the man leapt into the air and landed on top of her. Then he ripped her head off. Blood sprayed from her neck. 

The evil force continued to possess more and more people.

As they got possessed, innocent people tried to run away. But most of them didn’t make it as the deadites tore off their heads, limbs and tore open their stomach, pulling out their intestines. 

“CALL THE GHOSTBUST……..!” cried a man as he got split in two by four deadites. Each of them were pulling at his limbs.

  
  
  
  
  
  


The deadite attack was on the news. Peck watched it with admiration.

“And best of all, I could frame the Ghostbusters!” he exclaimed. “No, what did those notes say about controlling the dead?”

He read the notes again.

His appetite was getting better.

“I can control my army to kill those bastards,” he said with glee. 

He began to read the incantation to control the deadites.

Back at the massacre in the city, the deadites stopped killing people, and just started to make their way down the streets. Other deadites joined too. It was as if they were a cult.

  
  
  
  
  
  


Janine and Louis watched the news in horror. 

“I hope the guys know about this,” said Louis. “Oh, I forgot to take the garbage out.”

Louis went outside to put out the garbage. Then he saw the evil force running toward him. 

“No! No! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

He tried to run back into the house, but the evil force got him.

“Louis?” asked Janine as she got off the sofa and walked to the door. 

“Louis?”

Deadite Louis appeared and scared the life out of her. 

Then the deadite Louis started to walk out of the neighbourhood and join the rest of the crowd of Deadites.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


At Ghostbusters H.Q., the boys watched the news in horror. 

Just then, there was a knock on the door.

“It could be those things,” said Winston.

Taking precautions, the Ghostbusters decided to put their proton packs on.

Armed to the teeth, they were ready to open the door.

Ray opened and the Ghostbusters aimed their wands.

The visitor was Ash.

“You!” snapped Peter.

“Er, hey, Ghostbusters,” greeted Ash.

“You know the idiot who was hitting on my Dana?” Peter asked Ray.

“Yeah,” said Ray. “Hey, you were right. His chin is big.”

“I’m sorry, that was your girl?” Ash asked Peter.

“Ex,” said Winston.

“But we’re still good friends,” said Peter.

“Well, if you’re just friends, I hope you didn’t mind……” Ash began.

“Come and see the backseat of my Delta,” Peter quoted Ash.

“Did he actually say that to her?” asked Winston.

“Yes,” said Peter sternly.

The other Ghostbusters groaned. 

“That is weak,” said Egon. 

“Look, I’m here because I know why the people are possessed,” explained Ash. “Ever heard of Necronomicon Ex Mortis?”

“Roughly translated ‘Book of the Dead’,” Ray replied excitedly.

“I love it when he gets like this,” Peter told Winston.

Ash told his story about the cabin and finding the book, etc.

After his tale, Peter didn’t buy it.

“I get the whole possession stuff, but you going back in time to Medieval England is just phoney.”

“Hey, jerk, I just saved those peoples’ lives!” snapped Ash.

“After you read the magic words wrong and raised the army of the dead,” replied Peter.

“Yeah…..well…...I…...you know…...it was that Wizard’s fault…….,” Ash tried to find an excuse.

“Wait, the man from the sky,” said Ray.

“What?” asked Ash.

Ray got out a history book and showed them all an illustration of a man in medieval times holding what appears to be a chainsaw and a shotgun.

“For years, I thought that was a sword, but it was actually a chainsaw,” said Ray.

The Ghostbusters looked at the illustration and then at Ash.

Peter just had enough.

“Okay, Mr Williams, time to go,” he said.

“Peter,” said Egon.

“Guys, this jerk is a faker,” said Peter. “He’s pretending to be a famous warrior just to screw with us. He saw that drawing and pretended that it was him. He is a phoney.”

“You sound just like Peck,” said Winston.

“The less said about that asshole, the better,” said Peter.

CRASH! A deadite man burst into the Headquarters. 

“JOIN US!”

Then he looked at Ash.

“Ash! Fancy seeing you again!”

Ash then looked at Peter. 

“See? I was telling the truth, jerk.”

The deadite lunged at Ash, just then Egon fired his proton beam and it wrapped around the deadite. 

Ash ran out of the Headquarters.

“I’ll be back in a minute!”

“Ray, the trap!” Egon called.

Ray set the trap down and opened it up. A beam of light came out of it and shone over the deadite. 

But nothing was working. The deadite looked at the Ghostbusters and grinned evilly.

“Shit,” said Peter. 

They didn’t know what to do, their beams and the trap weren't of any use. 

BRMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!

The Ghostbusters turned around and were shocked to see Ash with his chainsaw and boomstick.

“Step aside, Ghostbusters. I’ll take care of this.”

Egon turned his beam off and the deadite leapt into the air toward Ash.

BANG!

Ash shot the deadite in the chest. 

With the deadite on the floor. Ash walked over to him and…

BRRRRRRRRRRMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!

He sawed his head off. 

The Ghostbusters were shocked by what they just saw, not only that, but they never actually saw somebody getting killed before. 

“And that’s how you do it, kids,” said Ash.

He looked at the frozen Ghostbusters. 

“What?” asked Ash. “Ohhh, first time?”

The Ghostbusters looked at him and nodded.

Then they ran straight to the toilets.

After a good 20 minutes of vomiting, they were fine.

“Ugh, I’ll never get that image out of my head,” groaned Winston. 

“Get used to it,” said Ash, who looked at Peter. “Now, would you say that I am a phoney now?”

“Okay, I believe you,” said Peter. “But, you actually carry that chainsaw and shotgun wherever you go?”

“You never know when evil will strike,” said Ash.

“And you’ve never been arrested?” asked Ray.

“I have a licence for my boomstick,” said Ash.

Just then the phone rang. Egon answered it and it was Janine telling them about Louis. 

Afterwards, Egon told the news to others. 

“Louis is possessed and he has joined the crowd of…...what do you call them, Ash?”

“Deadites,” said Ash.

“He’s joined the cult of deadites and they’re making their way out of the city.”

“Perhaps they’re going to their leader,” said Ray.

“The leader is probably the same asshole who read the book in the first place,” replied Ash.

“Well, let’s pay this leader a visit,” said Peter. 

The Ghostbusters brought their equipment inside Ecto-1. 

They were ready to go, but Ash didn’t want to get inside the car.

“I got my own car,” he said.

He showed them the Delta. Peter looked at it in disgust.

“What a piece of crap,” he groaned.

“Hey, don’t badmouth the classic,” said Ash.

“Would you two shut up and let's go already,” snapped Winston.

The boys got into their vehicles and drove off to follow the cult of deadites.

  
  
  
  
  
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Chapter 2

The two cars followed the crowd of 200 deadites walking to their destination.

The Ghostbusters spotted Janine and Oscar, Dana’s 6 year old son walking on the sidewalk. Janine looked terrified and Oscar was in tears.

Egon drove Ecto-1 beside them, and they both got into the car.

“Oscar, what’s wrong?” asked a concerned Ray.

“My mommy, she’s turned evil!” sobbed Oscar.

Janine hugged him tight.

The Ghostbusters just felt sorry for poor Oscar.

  
  
  


Here’s what happened to Dana:

  
  
  


Whilst the people of New york were being possessed, the evil force made its way through the window of Dana’s apartment.

AUTHOR’S NOTE: They always have their windows open in movies, don’t they?

The evil force made its way toward Dana in the kitchen and she screamed.

“Mom?” asked Oscar as he made his way out of his room and into the kitchen,

He only saw Dana from behind just standing there, not doing anything.

“Mom?”

Dana turned around and Oscar screamed as her face was demonic and her eyes were white.

“Join us, my baby!” Evil Dana said.

Oscar ran into his room and closed the door tight. He held the door so that Dana couldn’t get in.

“Oscar, do what your mother tells you!” roared evil Dana.

Oscar began to cry as evil Dana pounded her way through the door. 

Just then, Evil Dana stopped as she heard a voice.

“Dana?” 

It was Janine who made her way into the apartment. 

“Dana? Something terrible happened to Louis!”

“That’s fantastic!” roared Evil Dana with delight as she ran toward Janine and grabbed her by the neck. 

Janine screamed as she struggled to break free.

Evil Dana was about to claw Janine’s face until she froze all of a sudden.

Then Evil Dana let go of Janine’s neck and just left the apartment.

Evil Dana went outside to join the crowd of deadites. Oscar looked out of the window and sobbed as his mother was now a demon.

  
  
  
  
  
  


Back in Ecto-1, Peter hugged the sobbing Oscar.

“Oscar, we’re going to the man who is causing all of this. Once we defeat him, your mom might turn back to normal.”

“And Louis?” asked Janine.

“Yeah,” said Peter. 

“This is the only time you were ever nice to me,” sobbed Janine with a smile.

“I have my moments,” said Peter.

Ecto-1 and the Delta finally arrived at the deadites’ destination.

Outside Walter Peck’s house.

“Peck, I might’ve known,” said Ray.

Ash, the Ghostbusters, Oscar and Janine got out of their cars and our heroes tooled up for battle.

But the Gostbusters were having doubts.

“Our equipment didn’t work last time,” said Winston. 

“Well, just in case,” said Egon.

Our heroes made it to Peck’s garden. They hid in the back where no-one could see them. All of the deadites were in a crowd. Peck stood on a stage wearing a red robe and was holding onto the Book. It was as if he was king.

“Ugh, as if his dress sense wasn’t bad before,” snarked Peter.

“Brothers and sisters, I am your master,” announced Peck. “I will lead you all to glory as we rid the world of evil….”

“What?” asked a confused Winston.

“Just another bad guy who wants to take over the world for no reason,” said Ash. “Watch this, he’s going to say ‘We’ll destroy this world to make a better one.’”

“We’ll destroy this pathetic Earth to make a better one,” announced Peck. 

“Told ya,” Ash told the Ghostbusters. 

“Alright, can we shut Pecker up and save the world already?” asked an annoyed Peter.

Ash and the Ghostbusters walked out.

“Hey, dickless!” Peter called to Peck.

Peck was annoyed.

“My children,” he called to his deadites. “You must kill the Ghostbusters, they’re evil.”

“Ugh, you’re so pathetic,” groaned Peter.

The deadites began to make their way toward our heroes. 

BANG! BANG!

Ash shot some of them and blood sprayed everywhere.

The Ghostbusters decided to use their proton wands and traps anyway. 

But something incredible happened.

The evil force made its way toward the Ghostbusters. Ray fired his beam at it in fear and….

The beam actually caught it!

“The trap!” he called to Winston.

Winston opened the trap and the beam of light sucked the evil force in. It then closed shut.

“Whoa, I gotta get me one of those,” said Ash.

More shooting, chainsawing, proton beaming and catching the Evil forces in the traps later.

There were only 50 deadites left. 

Standing in front of Ash was Evil Dana.

“Gimme some sugar, baby!” laughed Evil Dana.

“Ugh, such a dumb line,” groaned Ash.

He revved up his chainsaw and………

“STOP!” cried Oscar.

He ran in front of his mother and looked at Ash.

“DON’T KILL MY MOM!”

“Kid, that is not your mom anymore,” said Ash. “Now get out of here.”

Oscar was in tears as he refused to move.

He looked at his evil mother.

“Mom?”

Evil Dana just grinned evilly at him.

“Mom? Please come back,” sobbed Oscar.

Tears flowed from Oscar’s eyes. 

Evil Dana just stopped laughing evilly and just stared at him.

Then Oscar hugged her.

“Kid, no!” cried Ash.

As Evil Dana was being hugged, she felt different. 

She was changing. 

Her eyes were back to normal and her face was no longer demonic.

She hugged Oscar back. 

“Honey, what happened?”

“Mommy,” sobbed Oscar as he hugged him tightly. 

The Ghostbusters all felt emotional as they watched this, so did Ash. They shed manly tears. 

“I’m such a softie,” said Ash. 

The other deadites just looked at what was going on, and they too couldn’t take it. They also began to cry. 

But Peck had enough.

“ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE!” he snapped.

“Ugh, you just had to kill the moment!” Peter snapped.

Peck pointed at him.

“Dr Venkman, JUST…….SHUT……..UP!”

“Or what?” asked Peter.

“Mr Tully, kill them!” ordered Peck. 

Evil Louis was about to attack our heroes, until Janine stood in front of him.

She looked at Evil Louis into his eyes.

Louis looked back.

“TODAY, MR TULLY!” snapped Peck. 

But Louis just stood there. 

“MR TULLY!” barked Peck.

Louis looked at him, he was back to normal.

“As my mom would always say, ‘Eat Shit and die’,” said Louis. 

He then hugged Janine and they kissed. 

Peck was furious.

“RIGHT, YOU’VE ASKED FOR IT!”

He began to read an incantation from the book. 

Then he began to get bigger and bigger and even began to grow muscles. His shirt was tearing. 

“Pecker is getting hard,” said Peter. 

Peck was now a deadite. But he was now 8 feet tall and was covered in veins, warts and had white eyes and sharp teeth. 

“I AM OFFICIALLY A GOD!” announced Deadite Peck.

“No, you’re an even bigger prick than before,” Peter replied. 

“I’m going to do to you what I’ve been wanting to do to you for years, Dr Venkman!” growled Deadite Peck. “I’m going to tear your flesh off and force it down your throat!”

Deadite Peck made his way toward our heroes.

“If we can get the book off him, we can open a portal to send him to another dimension,” said Ash. 

“I think we can use our beams to hold him down,” said Egon.

The Ghostbusters pointed their wands at the deadite Peck and each one fired his beam at one of Peck’s limbs. 

Peck’s arms and legs had the beams wrapped around them just holding him still.

He couldn't move.

Peter’s beam was wrapped around Peck’s hand that was holding the book. Peter brought the hand down.

“NOW, ASH!”

Ash ran toward the hand and…..

BRMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!

“ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” screamed Peck as his hand was sawed off.

“Now you know how _I_ feel,” said Ash.

Ash picked up the book and saw that Professor Knowby’s notes were inside the book.

“Thank you, professor,” said Ash as he began to read the incantation to open the portal. 

A massive portal appeared behind Peck and it began to suck him in. 

So was everything else and everyone. 

Everyone held onto objects or whatever they could for dear life to avoid getting sucked in.

Ash read the final word to close the portal.

“KANDA!”

The portal was closed. 

The deadites were now people again. The battle was over. 

“Ash, the beers are on you,” Peter told him.

  
  
  
  
  


Where was Peck taken to?

Peck had transformed back to himself and was lying on the ground. As he looked up, he saw knights and horses everywhere. 

A knight called Arthur looked at him. 

“Did you come here by reading a book?”

“Get away from me, you freak!” snapped Peck. 

“Thou shall not talk to our king like that!” shouted a guard as he grabbed Peck by the shirt.

“That’s it! I’ll have you all arrested!” shouted Peck as he pointed at several people. “You and you and you and you….”

“To the pit with him,” said Arthur. 

The knights dragged the angry Peck away.

There would be a show at the pit that night.

Arthur told his friend, Henry about this.

“Tonight shall be very groovy,” said Arthur.

“Where did you hear that word from?” asked Henry.

“I honestly don’t know,” said Arthur.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Back in 1994, Ash was ready to go. But he wanted to say goodbye to the Ghostbusters first.

“Goodbye, Ash,” said Peter. “And the next time you get drunk, please lock your door so that no-one comes into your house and steals the book again.”

“Good thing I found out the thief was from New York,” said Ash. “Yeah, well, have fun busting ghosts, guys. We might meet again in the future.”

“Maybe,” said Ray.

Ash then left. 

The Evil Force's voice could be heard inside the trap. 

"I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your soul!" 

"Ugh, just put it in the containment unit already!" groaned Peter. 

Ray put the trap into the unit and the evil force was released into it. 

"I'll swallow your soul! I'll swallow your...." 

"That's better," said Winston. 

So Ash drove back to Michigan in his car.

“Wonder if I’ll have another crazy adventure in the future soon,” he thought.

Well, he only had a year to wait.

  
  
  
  
  
  


In 1995, he went to his local bar, where a hot Russian chick, a scientist with a white shirt and black trousers, and another man and woman.

They all groaned as they watched Ash flirt with the barmaid, very badly.

“Ugh, that’s the man who is going to help us?” groaned the Russian woman.

“I’m afraid so,” said the scientist.

The hot Russian was Alice from “Resident Evil”, the scientist was Herbert West from “Re-Animator”, the other woman was Kirsty from “Hellraiser” and the other man was Carlsen from “Lifeforce”.

Find out what happens next in “The Greatest Horror Crossover Ever”!

  
  
  


THE END

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
